| How to Get Your Children Excited About the New Arrival |
How to Get Your Children Excited About the New Arrival
The sudden appearance of a new baby can be rough on the other children in the family. Daily routines
are disrupted and suddenly mom and dad are too busy to pay attention to older siblings. Worst of all, the
new baby is the instant star of the family - the center of attention. The adorable baby is the big attraction
for everyone from mom and dad, to visiting relatives, to casual acquaintances bumped into at the mall,
right down to strangers on the street. Everyone is talking baby talk, cooing at the new baby, and making
a fuss over the newborn. The older kids may feel shunted aside and resentful. This is especially true for
the displaced former baby of the family.
Given these natural reactions, anything that you can do to prepare your other children for the new arrival
will ease the transition. Everything you can do to involve your kids in advance and to get them to actually
look forward to the birth will make a big difference in how they experience it. It might even help establish a
stronger brother or sister bond with the new baby that will contribute to the lasting closeness of a positive
sibling relationship.
Here are some simple ideas that expectant parents might try, to smooth the road ahead for their other
children. Most are common knowledge or simply common sense, but sometimes too easily forgotten amid
all the excitement and activity surrounding the birth of a new baby. A few might be new ideas that are
worth a try. A little advance thought and preparation may go a long way towards making the "blessed
event" a blessing for the ENTIRE family. Hopefully, you'll be inspired to try some of these ideas, so here
goes.
Let your other kids in on the secret as soon as the pregnancy is confirmed, well before it is obvious just
by looking at mom. Even with your youngest children, try to give them some understanding of the
changes that mom is going through and what they mean. Check out your local public library. It should
have books geared to all different ages that can explain, in terms that children can understand, the
biological process of having a baby. Picture books about baby animals may also help crystalize the
concept and relate it to something your kids have already experienced, like watching newborn kittens, for
example.
The library or local bookstore should also be able to guide you to works of fiction, including picture books
for preschoolers, that focus on the arrival of a new baby in the family and such issues as jealousy and
feelings of neglect. Quiet parent-child story reading times can provide an ideal opportunity to prepare
young children for changes that are on the way and to reassure them of their own importance and
irreplaceable position in the family. Discuss things openly and answer your kids' questions.
Encourage your children to think about life with the new baby and how family routines will be altered.
Coax your kids to develop their own lists of things that will be fun about having a new baby in the house -
for example, they can push the baby carriage and help dress the baby. Help them think about all the
things that they'll be able to share with and teach the baby as he or she grows up and how important
their role will be as a "big brother" or "big sister."
At other times, let them focus on coming up with ways that they can help care for the baby or have them
think of things they can do around the house to ease the burden on mom and dad. Also, take this
opportunity to make your kids aware that babies require gentle handling and a quiet environment. You
might even use a baby doll with your younger children to role play baby's diaper changing and feeding.
Nurture the feeling that every family member is of equal importance and that each occupies a special
niche and has special contributions to make. No one is being replaced by the baby and the family cannot
be whole unless EVERYONE is a part of it. If your kids internalize this belief, you may be able to avoid
some of the trauma and the understandable resentment toward this little stranger who has stolen mommy
and daddy's hearts. The better your children are prepared for the impending event, the better they'll be
able to cope with it emotionally.
As part of that preparation process, from time to time plan special activities with your kids that relate to
babies. For example, they might draw pictures of babies or collect baby photos from magazines and
create a collage. Sit down and go through photo albums of your kids' baby pictures and reminisce with
them about their own arrivals into the world. Re-tell any family anecdotes surrounding their births. Teach
your children lullabies that they can sing to the baby, plus finger games and "peek-a-boo" games to
entertain their new brother or sister.
Arts and crafts projects can furnish a special parent-child discussion and sharing time and may
sometimes revolve around preparations for the new baby. Kids can make pictures to hang in the baby's
room, or create a baby-safe mobile to hang over the baby's crib, or draw scenes in which they imagine
their lives with the new baby - rocking the baby in their arms, and so forth.
Let the kids be involved in every facet of the preparations that you yourself are making for the baby's
arrival. Your kids can help you repaint the nursery or paint a mural on the nursery wall, and help you pick
out baby furniture, bedding and nursery decorations. They can choose baby clothes that appeal to them.
All of these things can later give the children pride and a sense of importance and inclusion in the baby's
life. When grandma says "What a cute bib the baby's wearing," your preschooler can say "I picked it !"
In addition, make your children key members of the family committee that chooses a name for the new
baby. Keep the kids involved and actively participating and then, as the birth becomes imminent, dad and
the kids may even conspire to prepare some extra, special, secret surprises for mom and the baby, like
buying or creating a special keepsake item or putting together a "welcome home" party.
In short, it's always worth the effort to do as much as you can to get your kids involved in and excited
about the arrival of a new baby. Include them in every step of the process. The more they feel that it is
THEIR baby, too, the more positive their attitudes will be towards the baby. In this way, you can try to
minimize the natural insecurities and feelings of jealousy that go with the territory.
The suggestions mentioned in this article can help lay the groundwork for good sibling relationships but,
of course, you can't rest on your laurels once the baby is born. After the baby arrives, try to do
everything you can to set aside some special time each day that's just for you and each of your other
children. Offer them special little treats or outings or surprises, and encourage grandma and grandpa to
do the same. To reduce jealousy, give your kids pride in the things that they CAN do that the baby can't
do, like dressing themselves or enjoying a movie or reciting their ABCs. Continue along the path that you
started on months earlier - reassure your kids that each of them is just as important as the baby is, so
that they won't feel that they must compete for your love and attention.
Good luck and oh, by the way, congratulations !
About the Author: Visit http://www.childrensclothingbabyclothes.com for clothing and gift items for children
and babies, all decorated with pictures from children's stories. Barbara Freedman-DeVito is a
professional storyteller.
The sudden appearance of a new baby can be rough on the other children in the family. Daily routines
are disrupted and suddenly mom and dad are too busy to pay attention to older siblings. Worst of all, the
new baby is the instant star of the family - the center of attention. The adorable baby is the big attraction
for everyone from mom and dad, to visiting relatives, to casual acquaintances bumped into at the mall,
right down to strangers on the street. Everyone is talking baby talk, cooing at the new baby, and making
a fuss over the newborn. The older kids may feel shunted aside and resentful. This is especially true for
the displaced former baby of the family.
Given these natural reactions, anything that you can do to prepare your other children for the new arrival
will ease the transition. Everything you can do to involve your kids in advance and to get them to actually
look forward to the birth will make a big difference in how they experience it. It might even help establish a
stronger brother or sister bond with the new baby that will contribute to the lasting closeness of a positive
sibling relationship.
Here are some simple ideas that expectant parents might try, to smooth the road ahead for their other
children. Most are common knowledge or simply common sense, but sometimes too easily forgotten amid
all the excitement and activity surrounding the birth of a new baby. A few might be new ideas that are
worth a try. A little advance thought and preparation may go a long way towards making the "blessed
event" a blessing for the ENTIRE family. Hopefully, you'll be inspired to try some of these ideas, so here
goes.
Let your other kids in on the secret as soon as the pregnancy is confirmed, well before it is obvious just
by looking at mom. Even with your youngest children, try to give them some understanding of the
changes that mom is going through and what they mean. Check out your local public library. It should
have books geared to all different ages that can explain, in terms that children can understand, the
biological process of having a baby. Picture books about baby animals may also help crystalize the
concept and relate it to something your kids have already experienced, like watching newborn kittens, for
example.
The library or local bookstore should also be able to guide you to works of fiction, including picture books
for preschoolers, that focus on the arrival of a new baby in the family and such issues as jealousy and
feelings of neglect. Quiet parent-child story reading times can provide an ideal opportunity to prepare
young children for changes that are on the way and to reassure them of their own importance and
irreplaceable position in the family. Discuss things openly and answer your kids' questions.
Encourage your children to think about life with the new baby and how family routines will be altered.
Coax your kids to develop their own lists of things that will be fun about having a new baby in the house -
for example, they can push the baby carriage and help dress the baby. Help them think about all the
things that they'll be able to share with and teach the baby as he or she grows up and how important
their role will be as a "big brother" or "big sister."
At other times, let them focus on coming up with ways that they can help care for the baby or have them
think of things they can do around the house to ease the burden on mom and dad. Also, take this
opportunity to make your kids aware that babies require gentle handling and a quiet environment. You
might even use a baby doll with your younger children to role play baby's diaper changing and feeding.
Nurture the feeling that every family member is of equal importance and that each occupies a special
niche and has special contributions to make. No one is being replaced by the baby and the family cannot
be whole unless EVERYONE is a part of it. If your kids internalize this belief, you may be able to avoid
some of the trauma and the understandable resentment toward this little stranger who has stolen mommy
and daddy's hearts. The better your children are prepared for the impending event, the better they'll be
able to cope with it emotionally.
As part of that preparation process, from time to time plan special activities with your kids that relate to
babies. For example, they might draw pictures of babies or collect baby photos from magazines and
create a collage. Sit down and go through photo albums of your kids' baby pictures and reminisce with
them about their own arrivals into the world. Re-tell any family anecdotes surrounding their births. Teach
your children lullabies that they can sing to the baby, plus finger games and "peek-a-boo" games to
entertain their new brother or sister.
Arts and crafts projects can furnish a special parent-child discussion and sharing time and may
sometimes revolve around preparations for the new baby. Kids can make pictures to hang in the baby's
room, or create a baby-safe mobile to hang over the baby's crib, or draw scenes in which they imagine
their lives with the new baby - rocking the baby in their arms, and so forth.
Let the kids be involved in every facet of the preparations that you yourself are making for the baby's
arrival. Your kids can help you repaint the nursery or paint a mural on the nursery wall, and help you pick
out baby furniture, bedding and nursery decorations. They can choose baby clothes that appeal to them.
All of these things can later give the children pride and a sense of importance and inclusion in the baby's
life. When grandma says "What a cute bib the baby's wearing," your preschooler can say "I picked it !"
In addition, make your children key members of the family committee that chooses a name for the new
baby. Keep the kids involved and actively participating and then, as the birth becomes imminent, dad and
the kids may even conspire to prepare some extra, special, secret surprises for mom and the baby, like
buying or creating a special keepsake item or putting together a "welcome home" party.
In short, it's always worth the effort to do as much as you can to get your kids involved in and excited
about the arrival of a new baby. Include them in every step of the process. The more they feel that it is
THEIR baby, too, the more positive their attitudes will be towards the baby. In this way, you can try to
minimize the natural insecurities and feelings of jealousy that go with the territory.
The suggestions mentioned in this article can help lay the groundwork for good sibling relationships but,
of course, you can't rest on your laurels once the baby is born. After the baby arrives, try to do
everything you can to set aside some special time each day that's just for you and each of your other
children. Offer them special little treats or outings or surprises, and encourage grandma and grandpa to
do the same. To reduce jealousy, give your kids pride in the things that they CAN do that the baby can't
do, like dressing themselves or enjoying a movie or reciting their ABCs. Continue along the path that you
started on months earlier - reassure your kids that each of them is just as important as the baby is, so
that they won't feel that they must compete for your love and attention.
Good luck and oh, by the way, congratulations !
About the Author: Visit http://www.childrensclothingbabyclothes.com for clothing and gift items for children
and babies, all decorated with pictures from children's stories. Barbara Freedman-DeVito is a
professional storyteller.
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